An Interesting Day

Today has been the epitome of interesting days. It’s Reading Day-which roughly translates into “Everyone stay home because there are no classes or exams today”. I made it to campus around 7 this morning, work started at 9 and I will be here for at least 2 more hours. Things to highlight today:

It was supposed to rain, my hair frizzed up enough, and then it got completely cleared. Hair still fluffy.

I’ve only seen two other undergrads on campus today. One of them was at 8AM, one of them at noon.

I got into a philosophical conversation about eating placenta. (And how you can eat it with rice and broccoli apparently.)

I got into a conversation about how not knowing who Prince or the Beatles are makes you uncultured.

I (and my coworker) thoroughly creeped out our boss by telling her fast food restroom horror stories (I worked at Subway, she worked at Chipotle and my husband worked at McDonalds).

I have thusly survived on one cup of coffee, two peanut butter sandwiches, a handful of walnuts and a handful of chocolate chips (and plenty of water).

I completely used up a whole highlighter in my job this morning, and half of another one.

I found out that I may have a research project open to me in the fall.

One of my bosses has been playing Prince for the past hour or so and I know all the songs.

I started out this morning listening to my Spanish Pandora station-where only the commercials were in Spanish (and I thusly complained).

I printed out too many labels this morning so I have been wearing TWO labels which say “Independent Study Grad Student”. I am neither a grad student, nor am I in independent study-I am in fact paid to work as an undergrad. 

Honestly, I live for days like this. Seriously, this has been the weirdest day I have had in such a long time that it’s about to become my absolute favorite day ever. I don’t even know how to make it any better, but it’s gonna be hard to top it.

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How Beautiful is the Rain

In a post that got deleted before it was published, I talked about how I was tired of the concrete jungles, the greys of the world and how I needed a chance to reconnect to the earth, to feel the grass in my toes and to find a balance in my soul. I grew solemn, the chance of that happening becoming increasingly apparent that I would have to wait. And I resolved myself to the fact that I would take a trip to a park or something. I knew I had to find a way out.

Sometimes you find a quote in your life that really impacts you-even if you don’t know it yet. For me, that quote came from the movie V for Vendetta. Evey had just come out of her captivity ¬†and walked out on to the balcony with the line:

God is in the rain.

And when the thunder rolled in to my little apartment, the clouds growing darker and the skies hiding from the sun, I realized that my moment had come. I took the dog out quickly, before the thunder became too much and then I left him inside with my husband and ran outside. The lightning struck, the thunder rolled and the rain began to pour in waves. And the smile on my face could not have been any bigger. Now I am completely aware of the dangers of being outside in a storm, but I have danced with the lightning for years, and I do not believe that the thunder beings will hurt me. That’s a personal belief-not delusions.

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I realized that Evey was right. God is in the rain. And as I stood there, getting soaked through, I talked to him (and her). I asked and they answered. I thanked them for bringing me happiness, for finding a way to make me understand that I wasn’t alone. That I had the strength within me to battle my demons, to make a new start and to find my hope-wherever I put it.

For whatever reason, it became unacceptable for adults to dance in the puddles. There was an age when it was no longer what “ladies” do. But I have to be honest, each time the rain pours down, I feel myself being cleansed of all of the negativity and the anguish and the stress that I felt and being made new. And the thing is, I know to others I look silly. I look like I’m immature and irresponsible and wacky. But the way I see it, the only one who can decide if I’m being silly is me. And if dancing in the rain is how I communicate with my gods, then no one can take that away from me.

Rain

This past week has been rough. I’ve been dealing with some things that shall remain private, and it’s put some stress on my husband who has had to endure late night talks into the wee hours of the dawn and the constant need for help. He’s been a real hero about it and with his help, I rise stronger each time. So by the time the rain fell, I knew that it was sent for me.

I called and they heard me.

Thankfulness, Day Four

Today, I am thankful for nature.

I lived in the country almost my entire life, minus about a total of four years. Some of that time, I was only a baby and do not remember. I lived on my own for a year and now I live with my husband in the big, sprawling city. I have no complaints about my life so far, save the fact that I cannot enjoy nature they way I could when I did not live in the city.

Nature is this big, glorious thing. It’s filled with magick and mystery and wonder. In the morning, there is dew on the grass, which you mowed the day before. There are gravel roads which stretch on for miles, sometimes the dust kicks up when you drive too fast, or the weather has been too dry. Trees line the roads, like they did in old fairytale stories. The lazy days of summer can be handled with a little time in the creek. In the spring and fall, thunderstorms bring mudrunnin and dancig in the rain. 

In the spring, your world blossoms with green and white and pink, little shoots of crops tilting their head towards the sun. By the summer, whole fields of food are alive, catching the unforgiving warmth of the sun, the blissful cool of the rains. In fall, harvest begins and with it, the chance to see hay bales, mazes and hayrides. You’re greeted each day by the magnificent art that crosses your eye at every glance. And just when you think life can be no more beautiful, the first snowflakes dance lazily across your face.

Little cottonballs litter the browning ground, a little more each day. Sometimes the temperature warms and they disappear. Sometimes the temperature drops and you are left with little sheets of ice. But on those most special occasions, you awake to find you have inherited acres worth of diamonds. Your coffee feels a little happier, blankets a little warmer and your heart bursts at the prospects of getting outside to make snow angels.

The thing is, that’s just the tip of the iceberg. Nature is more than just seasons and weather patterns. It’s the coraking of bullfrogs late summer evenings. It’s the migration of butterflies in fall, along with the geese returning in spring. It’s each individual organism being alive and being recognized as sentient, beautiful creatures living in the same space we are. You can’t help but feel small and large all at the same time. And that’s why I’m thankful for nature.